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November 30 Reflections...the years not over yet but i'm already starting to look back and reflect on past events.
it's not something i usually do too often, never been much of one to keep scrapbooks or dairies
but i was talking with my one friend (Manda:) and she was reminiscing on some events this year
and it brought back quite a few memories.
Wow, is one of the words i have for this year, it hasn't been all good but definately interesting
and extremely hectic and one of the most eventful years of my short life. (17 soon to be 18 years! yay!)
it's been hard and certainly trying but at least i don't regret most of the decisions i made
 and the sense of accomplishment for the effort i put in is not something i would replace.
i have made my mistakes and hopefully learnt from them although sometimes (painfully)
we have to go thru it 3 or 4 times to really get the message! Arg. Lol!
This year i learnt that
(1) it is not such a good idea to go on a mission trip in the middle of the school year!
Well its good for the people who you help wherever you go and usually good for your spiritual walk but definately
not good for school work as you suddenly realise that your relationship with God and your relationship with
others(people) is much more important than school work. - (not good for motivation) but thankfully i had
teachers that understood so i got thru it some how.
(2) usually what you think will be harmless turns out to be something that is very harmful!! and gets you into a pickle!
(not literaly tho. LoL) haha or rather between a rock and a hard place.
yes that was the one situation for me, i mean i felt good about myself until i saw this one person and i felt guilty, sad
and bad all at the same time. even tho i could have had a really great night i messed it up for myself! cus of my past
actions and assumtions, i was partly to blame for the outcome althou thankfully some of the blame also rested on my
friends, my mother and the mentioned person. but i do not blame or hold anything against them cus it was only natural
assumtions. anyways enough of my regrets and on to my next point
(3) if you stick thru it you'll come out alive,
and a tip - don't look back
yeah i've nearly made it and it feels soo good! just stick in there whatever situation you're going thru, the end will
come and it will feel so good!
well that's almost all for tonight
it was really nice to be blogging again
peace and love to everyone
God loves You! and wants the Best for You.
hold on to that
Hugs ~ The Flaming Butterfly  October 30 lifeis as normal, except for the weather, well let's just say its acting up a little bit more then usual!
it's supposed to be spring but its behaving more like its still winter. Not Impressed! : [
contrary to the weather here i hope its going good for you wherever you are : )
life is good, but God is better
love, peace and blessings to you all
hugs ~ amy October 21 Paulie!!! my favourite cousin in the whole wide world!!is doing great : ) : D
i visited him today! yay! and he's still the same gorgeous guy as before ; )
except his hair is shaved and he's got stiches but it actually makes you notice his eyes more. lol
Paul if you read this, you have beautiful eyes, so unfair! : P
but i'm glad you have them, haha lol
so he's dong good and he's at home now, so glad, and walking and running and resting which is good.
Praise the Lord! THANKYOU Jesus!!!
God is awesome isn't he.
Peace Love and Joy to everyone!!
hugs ~ amy : D mwah! October 14 stuffthings to write about
but not really worth writing about
(exams, art, etc)
except that for art i now know what i am doing
and in the holidays i plan on teaching music to little kids!
and earning some money, so i can buy some presents! (for christmas)
i actually do enjoy art, i think i've been letting my work load torture me instead of torturing it.
do you kno what i mean? maybe not? lol haha hope you do
anywayz betta get back to studying, planning and painting!
peace 2 u, in your times of need
~ amy : ) October 10 hmm... another bump in the roadbut that is all it is
paul had to have surgery again this morning
found out yesterday
haven't heard any news yet how long does brain surgery take?
i hope this will finally be the last of it
i have peace though : )
which is a good thing
i am actually trusting God! yay!
well at least i feel like i am
yes i am : ) lol
God has been so awesomely good to me
my whole entire life
sure i have gone through some stuff
every one does i reckon (and many people much more than me)
but through it all God has been there
always
peace to you all ~ amy
p.s if you need someone to listen or read
send me an email : doormouse_89@hotmail.com : ) October 04 Good News!!!my cousin is getting better!
isn't it wonderful!!!
Yay! thankyou Jesus!!
i hope you all have a Fantastic day!
God Bless you all heaps!
lots of hugs!
~ amy : D September 26 more newsDO NOT, WHAT EVER YOU DO, STOP PRAYING
my cousin needs it now more than ever
yesterday we learned that the bacteria has moved further into his brain
this is not good, BUT we had a major prayer session as a family last night
and i believe his condition is much better today
THERE WILL BE A TURN AROUND!
this is definately not the will of God and we must battle the evil one together
he is truly the best cousin i have, i do not want to loose him
and i'm afraid he might not be truly christian
if you have and are praying please put your name in the comments,
it just helps to know that there are people out there praying for him
thanks heaps
i really really appreciate it
~ amy September 22 URGENT NEWSmy cousin had to go in to surgery AGAIN this week
because another absys had formed on his brain again, and they DON'T KNOW WHY
pls pls pray and do not stop praying that this will not happen again.
i know i'm asking for quite a bit of your time but when you need me to pray i'll be here.
thankyou so much
the Lord's richest blessing apon you!
hugs ~ amy : ) recent newstoday was the last day of school for the third term. YEAH!!!! lol
not that that means any less work, it means two weeks catch up on work!
and movies and b-day parties!! Whoo!! haha
already today have watched Two movies! really good ones too, i might add
Garfield 2 and Stick It, in that order. i usually only watch one at a time but i felt like splashing!
i love movies that make you laugh and make you want to do exercise and especially dance!
it was so funny, me and my sister were dancing while we waited for a parent to pick us up.
of course we'd stop and giggle when people walked by, cus they usually looked at us!
we were in the one corner. but guess what! it gets better, this skater guy came and sat with his back to us like a way away but every now and then he would look at us. he tried not to be conspicuous but the little foiliage(in this cetre piece thing on either side of the stairs ) didn't really cover much. and when my sister caught him looking she gave him these funny looks! it was hilarious!
this is for Mehak
who asked me (just a little while before the teacher walked in!) about my love life. ha! what love life?? actually i'm glad i don't have one. cause they usually tend to get complicated around exam time. as james my friend can vouch for. although i do have a few crushes at the moment. SHH.. don't tell anyone!!! lol YEAH I RECKON IT MEANS I'M NORMAL : ) oops caps lock, anywho. i'm keeping them under control. i'm really good at that actually : )
but the most important news is not good news and is detailed in my next blog September 14 please pray, pleasei know i said i wouldn't write again this week
but something very urgent has come up
this afternoon we recieved a phone call form my aunt
telling us that my cousin, Paul, is in hospital
and that he's just about to go in for brain surgery
we were so shocked, paul is only 15
and he is the nicest guy out (goodlooking too, not that that changes anything)
apparently it was something about an absys on the frontal lobe of the brain
and they could only remove it through surgery
although there is still possibilities of complications
but we as an entire family have prayed and are praying and are
trusting in Father God for a safe and clean cut, no complication procedure.
any prayer that you could offer would be so much appreciated
i believe that at the moment he is still in surgery,
we haven't received any more news since
pls pray, thankyou so much
~ yours truly ~ amy September 12 why am i like this?why am i like this?
what do i need?
why do i seek
your approval
to succeed
at accepting myself
at believing in me
what do i need?
what do i need?
to block you out
so i can go on
to clean my thoughts
of your sad song
pls lord help me
i want to believe
that you can use me
and help me to see
the best of others
and the best of me
help me to be free
of anxiety
help me to release
your peace in my life
help me to be
who You made me to be
that is my desire lord
that is my need
pls help me
before i bleed
to death
from the wounds
i have helped others create
i know you will come
at the right time
i thank you lord now
for always being
faithful to me
in my time of need
(just needed to get some emotions out before i go for another week )
absenteelol yes i will be an (above title heading) for the next week and a half. totally. as you have probably noticed i haven't surfaced for a very long while on msn (if you haven't, shocked hurt look on face, lol ;) except the occasional blogs. but i thought i'd just let you know that there is no chace in the following week. because, alas i must take school seriously.
Actually its a really good thing and i am enjoying being proactive and watching less T.v.
if you have had anything exciting happen or anything you want to tell me about, pls!!! post a comment. i will read as soon as i get a chance : )
i love you all! (in the friend way of course;)
bear hugs all around! (except to jacque because he doesn't like hugs, its terrible!!! how can anyone not like hugs?!?! pls tell me! but its okay i only have a certain hug quota so at least 1 more person will get a hug : ) lol
true peace be yours always, that is one of my deepest desires for you
as i know how precious peace is
the Lord God bless you abundantly! (lots and lots:)!!
~ amy  August 31 Psalm 121 (personalised, swapped you s for me s)(A song for the scent to Jerusalem.)
I look up to the mountains -
does my help come from there?
My help comes from the LORD,
who made the heavens and the earth!
He will not let me stumble and fall;
the one who watches over me will not
sleep.
Indeed, he who watches over Israel
never tires and never sleeps.
The LORD himself watches over me!
The LORD stands beside me as my
protective shade.
The sun will not hurt me by day,
nor the moon at night.
The LORD keeps me from all evil
and preserves my life.
The LORD keeps watch over me as I
come and go,
both now and forever.
i really like this psalm : ) its comforting and encouraging
thats all for today
God's blessings on you all
~ Amy August 30 word for today
August 28 i had a dream about youyou were wearing a yellow bikini
i told you, you looked nice, you were surprised
and replyed something or other
that i don't want to tell or it would give away the disguise
but i said it doesn't matter i've accepted you for who you are
the thing is i don't know what this dream meant
i suppose its kinda reresents things i've wanted to say
i want you to know i won't judge you, i haven't
i want to be someone you can confide in and rely on
but its not my place.
so all i will do is pray
cus i know thats the best way.
you have a place in my heart
that won't go away.
so this one thing i say
place your trust once again in God
and see for yourself that he really is there
don't let their words sway you
but find out the truth
i love you for some reason
i don't know why
i reckon its just God inside me trying to tell you
it's okay to cry, its okay to take a second try
be real with yourself
don't look away
what is your heart trying to say?
i hope you believe that my words are pure
and i truly care about your fears
don't give up
you'll make it through
if you want any sort of help
i'm here for you
yours sincerely
~ amy August 14 Ironic? or Proof?
‘We have seen that living things are too improbable and too beautifully “designed” to have come into existence by chance.’ Prof. Richard Dawkins, (world-renowned crusader for Darwinism and atheism)
: DI'M GOING TO BE A GIANT SLAYER!! WHOOHOO!!!!
(by the way i'm not talking about people:) August 07 what do you think of the changes?i quite like it, its simpler and logical
yeah... um : D
cya ~ amy! August 06 i have let laziness overtake mei'm feeling better today, thankyou so much Jordan, Maggie and stella! for your comments and encouragement
you are awesome people i'm so blessed to have you as friends : ) (and others at school as well :)
right now i've realised i'm quite selfish and lazy. i suppose we all are a bit. and i sabotage myself frequently
so that doesn't help. i've been having mood swings lately and quite often, which is not usual for me but in
the past one or two months they have been. so irritating : P lol some things have been sorted out this week. Thankyou God! and it was really cool cause i could actually sense people praying for me, i know that sounds weird but i felt much lighter.
thankyou all so much
have to go
~ amy
I LOVE YOU ALL!!! August 01 i depress myselfi know anyone of you can relate.
when those negative condemning thoughts attack,
you've got to be ready.
you've got to fight with all your strength
but when your weak and you blame yourself,
your own thoughts will supplement those from the devil.
ignorance is not bliss
and when knowlege comes it hurts
perhaps it is not either that is the problem
only deceiption that kills
the living, kills the heart
and assumtions really do make an ass out of you
(me thats an ass)
i've decided i do like myself, i just don't like what i've done and been doing.
i never realised, i never realised what it was that i was doing
perhaps you hate me?... i understand if you do
are you irritated with me?.. i would be too
but for your sake i hope you forgive me and move on.
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